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我不想麻烦别人

时间:2020-5-11 15:28:36 阅读: 次

“WOBUXIANGMAFANBIEREN”—


YILIHUIBIXINGRENGETEZHIANLIFENXI


JIBENZILIAO:NANXING 14SUI CHUERZAIDU CHUERSHANGXUEQIXIUXUE YINXINGGEGUPI、BUXIHUANHEJIAZHANGJIAOLIU、BUAIXUEXI、AISAHUANG、TAOXUEBEISONGDAOQIDIANXUEXIAO


LAIQIDIANQIANQINGKUANG:SHANGCHUYIZHIHOU,YINGYUTINGBUDONG,YEBUHUIDU,HUIJIAYEMEIRENJIAO,LAOSHIYAOQIUBEISHU,WANCHENGBULEBEISHUJIUHUIBEIJIAOJIAZHANG,MEICIJIAOJIAZHANGDOUSHIFUQINQU,FUQINZAIMANGYUSHENGYIDETONGSHI,HAIYAOYAOJINGCHANGPAOHENZHANGDELUQUXUEXIAO,MEICIJIANWANJIAZHANG,FUQINDOUSHISHUODADAOLI,YEMEIZHENZHENGDEBANGZHUDAOHAIZI,JIAOJIAZHANGDUOLE,JUEDEBUHAOYISI,ZUIHOUYICIBEIJIAOJIAZHANG,ZIJIBUXIANGMAFANFUQIN,ZHIHAOTAOXUE;TAOXUEHOUBEIBIAOGEDAIDAOWAISHENGYIGEXIANGZHENDEJISUZHIZHONGXUEDUWANCHUER,BIAOGEHEBIAOSAODOUZAINEISUOXUEXIAOJIAOSHU,YOUYIGE1SUIDUOHAIZI,ZHOUMODESHIHOU,XUEXIAOMEIDIFANGCHIFAN,BIAOGEJINGCHANGJIAOZIJIQUTAJIACHIFAN,ZIJIBUXIANGQU,JUEDETAIMAFANTAMENLE,DUWANCHUERJIUBUXIANGQUDULE;HUIXIANGFUQIN“PIANQIAN”,HETONGXUEYIQIQUWAIMIANWAN,CHILINGSHI;YOUXIYEBUSHITAIXIHUANWAN,ZHISHIBUSHANGXUESHIWULIAOCAIWANYOUXI,SHEHUISHANGDEPENGYOUZHISHIRENSHI,SHAOLAIWANG,ZHIWANSHOUJIYOUXI,BUQUWANGBA;YUDAOWENTIDESHIHOU,ZIJINENGCHULIDEZIJICHULI,BUNENGCHULIDEZHINENGBIEZHE,KEWANGYOURENBANGMANG;


GERENCHENGZHANGSHI:CONGXIAOHEYEYE、NAINAIYIQISHENGHUO,FUMUMANGYUZUOSHENGYI,HENSHAOYOUSHIJIANGUANZHUZIJI,FUMUJIAOYUDUOYIDAMAWEIZHU;CHUYISHIHOUFUMUDAIZIJIQUKTV,ZIJIBUZHIDAO18SUIYIXIADEHAIZIBUNENGQUYULECHANGSUO;FUMUYUXIAOXUEYINIANJILIYI,MAMALIKAIJIADAOLEWAISHENG,GEGEHEZIJIYOUYEYENAINAIFUZEFUYANG,FUQINZHIFUSHENGHUOFEIYONG,NAINAISHENTIBUHAO,HUANYOUDUOZHONGJIBING,CENGJINGRUYUANZHILIAODUOCI,FANGZHANGJIADESHIHOUGEGEHEZIJIHUIHEMUQINJUZHUYIDUANSHIJIAN,MUQINYU2019NIAN8YUEZAIHUN,BUDASUANZAIYAOHAIZI;FUQINMANGYUSHENGYI,MEISHIJIANGUOWENZIJI;XIAOXUE5NIANJI,FUQINZAIHUN,YUJIMUZAISHENGYOUYINVER,ZIJIBUYUANYIHETAMENJUZHUZAIYIQI,JUEDEBUXIANGQUDARAOJIMUYUFUQINDESHENGHUO;XIAOXUECHENGJIZHONGDENG,CHUYICHENGJIXIAJIANG,SHUXUEKAO70-80FEN,BANSHANGZHONGSHANGSHUIPING,QITACHA,BUXIANGBEISHU;DUCHUYISHIFUQINMEIJIZIJISHOUJI,CHUERSHIWEILELIANXIZIJIFANGBIANCAIPEILESHOUJI,KAISHIWANSHOUJIYOUXI,TAOXUEDESHIHOUMEISHIZUOWULIAO,HUIWANSHOUJIYOUXI,RENSHI3-4GESHEHUISHANGDEPENGYOU,ZHISHIPAZIJIBEIQIFUDESHIHOUYOURENBAOHU;ZAIQIDIANDEJIAZHANGJIANMIANRI,YUFUQINDANDUYIQIJIBENMEIHUASHUO,YUNAINAIHUADUOYIDIAN,JUEDEMAMADUIZIJIHAO,XIANGHEMAMAYIQISHENGHUO;


JIAZUSHI:FUQIN GAOZHONGWENHUA PINGCHANGHEHAIZIJIAOLIUSHAO MANGYUSHENGYI ;MUQIN XIAOXUEWENHUA LIHUNHOULIKAIHAIZIQUWAISHENG,ZHISHIJIAQIHAIZIQUZHAOMAMAGONGTONGSHENGHUOYIDUANSHIJIAN;GEGEDAZIJI2SUI,JINGCHANGJIAOXUNZIJI,HUIYUGEGECHAOJIADESHIQINGSHANGXIN,GEGEGAOYIZAIDU,XUEXIZAIBANLIQIAN20DUOMING,KAOSHANGDAXUEMEIWENTI;YEYENAINAIFUZEHAIZISUOYOUDESHENGHUOHEJIAOYU,YINWEIWENHUACHENGDUDI,ZAIXUEXISHANGBANGZHUBULEHAIZI,NAINAIDUOBING,DUOCIZHUYUANZHILIAO,JIALIHAIYOUYIWEI100SUIDECENGZUMUXUYAOZHAOGU,NAINAIDUIMUQINBUMAN,JUEDESHIMUQINPAOQILEHAIZI,DUIHAIZIDEJIMUYEBUMAN,JUEDETABUGUANHAIZI,BINGQIENAINAIRENWEIZIJIDEERZIMEIYOUZHUJIAN,JIMUTAIBADAO;MUQINRENWEISHIFUQINTAIGUOFEN,ZAITAJIADAIBUXIAQU,JIMURENWEISHIYEYENAINAIGUANHUAILEHAIZI,DARENMENDOUZAIHUXIANGZHIZEDUIFANG;NAINAIBURANGHAIZIDUIWAIRENSHUOFUMULIHUN,PABEIRENKANBUQI,BEIRENQIFU;


案例分析:童年时父母离异,母亲离开家,孩子感受到被重要的人“抛弃”,爷爷奶奶年事已高,只能负责生活,父亲忙于自己的生意和自己的新家庭,也无暇顾及孩子,妈妈也只是假期偶尔和孩子一起生活,孩子长期处于被忽略的状态,核心想法是:“我的父母都不喜欢我,别人怎么会喜欢我呢?”,因而总是回避和他人交流;他的想法是:“一旦人们认识我,他们就会发现我很差劲”,所以孩子总是害怕麻烦别人,不想去打扰别人的生活;(包括不敢去打扰父母的生活,不好意思去打扰表哥表嫂的生活);认为自己没有价值,主动与他人分离,自尊低、容易感到羞愧、对于别人的批评感到极度的焦虑,因些与他人尽量避免交流,以减少批评的可能;在生活中使用回避策略,不求上进,维持低标准;回避可能失败的任务;避免高难度的任务;回避求助,回避勤奋努力;回避社交、友谊、责难;表现出回避型人格特质;



GANYUFANGFA:RENZHIHEXINGWEILIAOFA 


1、GUILVYUNDONGHEZUOXISHIJIAN:ZHUJIANRANGHAIZIJIECHUSHEJIAOHUANJING,JINXINGSHEJIAOJINENGPEIXUN,ZAIQIDIANXUEXIAOYOUJIAOGUANJINXINGTUOZHANXUNLIAN,YINDAOHAIZIRONGRUTUANTI,TONGSHIXINSHENGGANGLAIXIAOSHI,DOUHUIPIPEILAOSHENGDAILINGTAMENSHUXIHUANJING、SHUXIXUEXIAODESHENGHUO,ZHEIYANGKEYIJIANSHAOHAIZIDESHEJIAOJIAOLV;DUOTIGONGHAIZIZAIGONGZHONGCHANGHEZHANSHIZIJIDEQINGJING,BIRUFAYAN、YANJIANG;


2、XINLIZIXUN:TONGGUOZHAO“SHENGMINGZHONGDESHANGUANGDIAN”DEFANGSHI,ANZHAOHAIZIDETUILI,SHIQINGDOUSHIZAOGAODE,DANYOUMEIYOU“LIWAI”FASHENGNI,ZHENGMINGZIJISHI“XINGDE”,ZHAODAOZIXINDEGANJUE,TONGSHI,CHAZHAOSHISHILAIZHIYIDUIZISHENHESHEHUIQINGJINGDEFUXINGZIDONGSIWEI;GULIHAIZISHUOCHUZIJIZHENZHENGDEXUYAO,TONGGUOFUQINZHIFUZIJISHENGHUOFEIYONG、SONGZIJILAIQIDIANXUEXIAO,MAMAJIAQIDEPEIBAN,LAIZHENGMINGHAIZIZIJISHIZHIDEAIDE,ZAIPENGYOUHEQINRENXINZHONGSHIZHONGYAODE;


3、WEIHAIZIXUNZHAOSHEHUIZHICHI:YUHAIZIDEFUQINDUOCIJIAOLIU,RANGTADUOGUANZHUHAIZIDECHENGZHANG,GAOSUHAIZIXINGCHENGZHEIZHONGXINGGEDEYUANYIN,RANGFUQIN“ZHIQIRAN,YEZHIQISUOYIRAN”,ERBUNENGYIWEIDEZEGUAIHAIZI;YUHAIZIDEMAMAQUDELIANXI,RANGHAIZIDEMAMADUOYUHAIZIJIAOLIU,DUOQUKANWANGHAIZI;


HOUJI:FUMULIYIBINGFEIHAIZICHANSHENGXINLIWENTIDEBIRANYINSU


DANGLIYIJIATINGDEHAIZICHUXIANWENTIDESHIHOU,FUMUHEJIARENZONGSHIZEGUAILIYIJIHAIZIDAILAIDEZHUDUOBULIYINSU,HAIYOUFEICHANGDUODEJIATINGJISHIHUNYINYIJINGMINGCUNSHIWANG,SHENZHIMEITIANDAMAZHENGCHAO,WEILEHAIZIYEYAOJIANCHIBULIHUN。QISHI,FUMULIYIBINGFEIHAIZICHANSHENGXINLIWENTIDEZHIJIEYUANYIN,ERFUMULIYIHOUDUIHAIZIDETAIDUHEJIAOYUFANGSHIQUESHIYINGXIANGHAIZISHENXINJIANKANGFAZHANDEZHONGYAOYINSU。ZHEIJIUSHIWEISHENMEBINGFEISUOYOUDANQINJIATINGDEHAIZIDOUYOUWENTI,BIRUMEIGUOZONGTONGAOBAMA、KELINDUNDOUSHILAIZIYUDANQINJIATING,QUEBUYINGXIANGTAMENCHENGWEIMEIGUOZONGTONG,BIRUDIANYINGYANYUANSUNLI,FUQINDEHUNYINBINGMEIYOUYINGXIANGTARIHOUDEHUNYINSHENGHUO;YEBINGFEISUOYOUSHUANGQINJIATINGDEHAIZIDOUMEIYOUWENTI,FUMUMEITIANDELENGZHAN、ZHENGCHAO、DAMAJIHAIZIDAILAIDEFUMIANYINGXIANGYAOYUANYUANDAYUDANQINJIATINGDUIHAIZIDEYINGXIANG,YINWEIHAIZIZAINEIYANGDEHUANJINGXIATONGYANGBUHUIKUAILE,GENGWEIKEPADESHITAMENKENENGHUIZAIFUMUNEIXIDEYONGBAOLIJIEJUEWENTIDEFANGSHI,HAIYOUKENENGYINWEIFUMUHUNYINDEBUXINGFURANGTAMENZHANGDAYIHOUBUZAIXIANGXINGANQINGHEHUNYINDENG,XIANGXINZHEIXIEDOUBUSHIFUMUYUANYIKANDAODEJIEGUO。XIANGFAN,JIBIANSHIDANQINJIATING,JIHAIZICHONGZUDEAIHEQIADANGDEJIAOYUFANGSHI,TONGYANGKEYIBAHAIZIPEIYANGCHENGJIANKANGKUAILEDEREN。


【XINLIKEPU】:HUIBIXINGRENGEZHANGAI(ZHAIZI: JINGSHENZHANGAIZHENDUANYUTONGJISHOUCEDSM5)


YOUHUIBIXINGRENGEZHANGAIDEGETIJIDUHAIXIU,JINGCHANGGANDAOBUGOUHAOHENRONGYIBEIJUJUE(BUBEIXUYAO,HUOBEIGANZOU)SHANGHAI,YINWEITAMENDEGANSHOUHEKONGJU,HUIBIYUTARENQINJINHUOJIECHU。ZAISHEJIAOQINGJINGZHONG,YOUHUIBIXINGRENGEZHANGAIDEGETIKENENGYINWEIHAIPASHUOCUOHUAHUOBEIXIURU,BEIQUXIAOHUOBEIYAZHI,ERHAIPADASHENGSHUOHUA。TAMENFEICHANGKEWANGBEITARENXIHUAN,KEWANGXIANGSHOUSHEHUIJIECHU,DANTAMENJIDUDEHAIPAHEHAIXIUZUZHILETAMENXIANGTARENSHENCHUSHOU。DANGCUNZAIYIXIAZHISHAO4ZHONGQINGKUANGSHI,KEZHENDUANCIZHANGAI:


1、HUIBIXUYAOSHEHUIJIECHUDEGONGZUO,YOUYUHAIPATARENHUIPIPING(ZHAOCHAER)HUOJUJUETA。


2、BIMIANYUTARENJIAOWANG,CHUFEIQUEXINZIJIBEIXIHUAN。


3、YOUYUHAIPABEIXIURUHUOCHAONONG,ZAIQINMIGUANXIZHONGSHOUXIANZHI。


4、FEICHANGDANXINZAISHEJIAOQINGJINGZHONGBEIPIPINGHUOJUJUE。


5、ZAIXINQINGJINGZHONGGANDAOHAIXIU,YINWEIGANJUEBUGOUHAO;


6、GANDAOXIANGDUITAREN,ZIJISHIWUNENGHUODIJIDE(DIZIZUN)。


7、BUYUANYIMAOXIANQUCANYUXINDESHEHUIJIECHUHUOQITAZHUIQIU(LIRU,ZHAOYIFENXINGONGZUO),YINWEIHAIPABEIXIURU。


HUIBIXINGRENGEZHANGAIDEJIBENTEZHENGSHIYIZHONGSHEJIAODIZHI、ZIGANNENGLIBUZUHEDUIFUXINGPINGJIAJIQIMINGANDEPUBIANMOSHI;QISHIBUWANYUCHENGNIANZAOQI,CUNZAIYUGEZHONGBEIJINGXIA。YINWEIHAIPAPIPING、FOUDINGHUOPAICHIERHUIBISHEJIDAOXIANZHURENJIJIECHUDEZHIYEHUODONG。KENENGYINWEIXINZERENZHAOZHITONGSHIDEPIPINGERJUJUESHENGQIAN。ZHEIXIEGETIHUIBIJIAOXINPENGYOU,CHUFEIKENDINGZIJINENGBEIXIHUANBINGBEIBUJIAPIPINGDIJIESHOU,CHUFEITONGGUOYANGEKAOYANZHENGSHILETAMENSHIXIANGFANDE,FOUZETARENCHANGBEIRENWEISHITIAOTIHEPIPINGXINGDE。GAIZHANGAIGETIBUHUICANJIAXIAOZUHUODONG,CHUFEIYOUFANFUERKANGKAIDEZHICHIHEGUANAI。JINGUAN,ZAIQUERENLEWUPIPINGDEJIENASHI,ZHEIXIEGETINENGGOUJIANLIQINMIGUANXI,DANRENJIJIANDEQINMIDUITAMENLAISHUOTONGCHANGSHIKUNNANDE,YINWEIHAIPABAOLU、BEICHAONONGHUOBEIXIURU,TAMENZAIQINMIGUANXIZHONGBIAOXIANJUJIN,NANYILUNJIZISHEN。


YOUYUGAIZHANGAIGETIRENWEIZAISHEJIAOCHANGHEHUIBEIPIPINGHUOBEIJUJUE,DUIFAXIANZHEIXIEFANYINGTEBIEMINGAN。RUGUOYOURENZUOCHUJISHISHIQINGWEIDEBUZANTONGHUOPIPING,TAMENKENENGYEHUIJUEDETEBIESHOUSHANG。TAMENWANGWANGSHIHAIXIU、ANJING、DIZHIHE“YINNI”DE,YINWEITAMENDANXINRENHEDUITAMENDEZHUYIDOUKENENGSHIBIANDIHUOJUJUEDE。TAMENYUQIWULUNZIJISHUOSHENME、BIERENDOUHUIRENWEISHI“CUODE”,SUOYITAMENKENENGSHENMEDOUBUSHUO。TAMENDUIWEIMIAODE、TISHIFENGCIHUOCHAOXIAODEXIANSUOZUOCHUQIANGLIEFANYING。JINGUANTAMENKEWANGJIJICANYUSHEJIAOSHENGHUO,DANTAMENHAIPABAZIJIDEKUAILEHEYUNQIFANGZAIBIERENSHOUZHONG。HUIBIXINGRENGEZHANGAIGETIYOUYUDAOGANDAONENGLIBUZUHEDIZIZUN,ERZAIXINDERENJIGUANWANGZHONGXIANDEJUJIN。ZAIYUMOSHENGRENDEJIAOWANGCHANGHE,HUIDUIZISHENSHEJIAONENGLIHEGERENMEILIDEHUAIYI、GULV、BIAOXIANDEGEWAIMINGXIAN。ZHEIXIEGETIRENWEIZIJIZAISHEJIAOFANGMIANBENZHUO,QUEFAGERENMEILIHUODIRENYIDENG。YOUYURENWEIKENENGLINGZIJINANWEIQING,TAMENTONGCHANGBUYUANMAOGERENFENGXIANHUOCANJIARENHEXINDEHUODONG。TAMENHENRONGYIKUADAYIBANQINGKUANGXIADEQIANZAIWEIXIAN,YOUYUDUIQUEDINGXINGDEANQUANXINGDEGUOGAOXUQIU,KENENGDAOZHIQISHENGHUOXIGUANDEXIANZHI。GAIZHANGAIGETIKENENGYINDANXINYIZHEBUDETI、CHUYANGXIANGERQUXIAOGONGZUOMIANSHI。WEIBUZUDAODEQUTIZHENGZHUANGHUOQITAWENTIKENENGCHENGWEIBIMIANCANJIAXINHUODONGDELIYOU。


DIZHI:KUNMINGSHIXISHANQUHAIKOUZHEN200HAO(YUANGONGRENDAXUE)

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